DURING MY FIRST year as a head coach of the St. John’s Military Academy Lancers, I took over a team that was 0-9 from the previous year. We struggled, but we won one game. I was discouraged but determined to fix the problems — but there were so many that I wasn’t sure I could solve them all. 

For Christmas that year, my wife, Anne, gave me a small poem she framed and wrote out in a beautiful calligraphy style that put it all in perspective. The poem is entitled “The Locker Room” and I would like to share it with you.

Locker Room
The values
Of the locker room become part of your life.
You learn to accept success, as well as pain,
Bad luck and defeat.
You must prove your faith
By being in condition,
Playing by the rules,
Teamwork
And putting out 100% all the time.
If your dedication is strong enough,
You will win.

You might not have enough points,
But you will always win.

Almost 15 years later, after my first year as the defensive coordinator for the Bellevue HS Wolverines, in Bellevue, Wash., the head coach, Butch Gonchroff, gave me a quote from Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr.  It read “The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.”

So what does all this have to do with the development of young men? It’s the reason we coach  — or at least it should be the reason. It is not the destination, it is the quest. 

For most people, evaluating a football program is all about the won-loss record. At the high school level, however, there are three major items that stand out as important. Did the coach contribute to our: A. Competitiveness to win. B. Development of character in athletes. C. Improvement of the program’s image.

Great coaches are leaders by example. Adherence to high standards of personal conduct by their coaches will earn the trust of the players. My favorite way of saying this is,“Do what is right when no one is looking.”

Setting the example always works to positively motivate others to succeed. A great leader not only is willing to undertake any task he wants his followers to accomplish, he often excels at those tasks. Deeds not words, a willingness to share hardships can inspire others to great achievement.

Do coaches make a difference? You bet they do! Let me tell you the story of a skinny high school kid. He was a track star, qualified for the state track meet and ran track for four years at college. But he learned about life in football. 

He was a second stringer, but got a lot of playing time through hard work. He put the team first —  played the opposing running back on the scout squad and always did what the coaches told him to do, never questioning a word. 

These coaches pushed him and it seemed like they never were satisfied with his efforts. So he tried to give more. He earned a letter and his coaches even helped him get a couple of small college offers to play football. But the young man had also earned an appointment to West Point. 

Four years later, after earning his degree from West Point he went back to tell his head coach he had done it. The coach beamed and told the young man that he always knew he was going to succeed. After a 20-year Army career, the now older man went into coaching — football and track. 15 years later, he had coached hundreds of athletes and has had both winning and losing seasons — but he always instilled the same values he was taught 44 years earlier in all his athletes. Not all of these athletes got it, but most did.
You have probably guessed by now that this young man was me. My coaches changed my life and you better believe you change your athlete’s lives. They instilled values and traits that made me learn how to be successful.  They were my role models. They would only accept my best efforts and they always kept pushing me. They stood firm in times of controversy.

My coaches won with me.  I’m sure most of your coaches won with you. Let’s all make a pact to go out and “win” for the athletes we coach.  My pledge as a coach is as follows: 

I will always coach with pride and class. I will be rough, aggressive and tough on my players, but I will never cheat or verbally or physically abuse my players. I will always respect my school, my athletes, my fellow coaches my opponents and the officials. I will let my player’s pads do the talking — never their mouths or my mouth. If I make a mistake I will accept the blame. I will never blame my players if we lose — if we lost, then I did not prepare them properly or I did not put them into a position to succeed. I will strive to be perfect. I will coach with passion. I will believe in my team and my coaches. I will thrive on pressure and difficult situations. I am a lucky man — I have
the once-in-a-lifetime chance to coach football!